Relationships of any type are important in our lives to help us grow as people and aid our mental well-being. Here are some tips on spotting healthy/unhealthy relationships and some ‘dos and don’ts’ of mental well-being and relationships.

Signs Of Unhealthy Relationship Behaviour

Below are some examples of unhealthy relationship behaviours. However, unhealthy behaviours can appear in other ways. If you think a behaviour is unhealthy, reach out to a trusted friend or a helpline for advice.

Manipulation

• Gas-lighting’- making you think things that aren’t true or making you doubt your own judgement, memory and perceptions
• Psychological and emotional games

Controlling Behaviour

• Of the clothes you wear, how you look and or sexual rules
• Of your phone, where you go and what you do

Jealous Behaviour

• Angry when you do something social without them
• Wanting to know everything about the other relationships in your life

Signs of Healthy Relationship Behaviours

Trust

• Fidelity (Sexual exclusivity), Physical safety, financial security, emotional predictability and truthfulness are all signs of trust in a healthy relationships

Equality

• Both persons needs are important in a relationship, not just one persons. Effort and work are done by both partners not just one
• You both encourage each others goals and dreams and you both express love and affection in your own way.

Honesty

• To be honest in a relationship means, telling your partner the truth not minding the circumstances surrounding you.
• It is the ability to be open and true to yourself and to your partner. An honest partner is straightforward and transparent in words and action. Honesty builds trust in a relationship

Respect

• Showing respect in a relationship is about treating each other in a considerate and friendly manner both in private and in public
• It means you are both able to express your personalities without feeling criticised and there is enough space and acceptance in the relationship to do so.

Mental Wellbeing & Relationships

Maintaining good mental well-being and maintaining relationships are equally important and can impact on each other. Below are some tips on how to navigate a relationship when mental well-being is low.

Do

• Take time with your family/friends to catch up
• Allow yourself time to unwind – process what has been going on that day
• Share thoughts/feelings/concerns
• Go outside, on your own or with others
• Consider what you want
• Ask a family member/friend their view on your mental wellbeing
• If needed, take action e.g. GP/Counsellor/other professional
• Be patient with yourself – figuring out what works for you takes time there’s a trial and error period
• Be patient with your partner
• Mindfulness/meditation

Don’t

• Bottle things up, brush them off
• Constantly distract yourself
• Come away from help before ready
• Go to the internet for help (Dr Google)
• Rely on social media/online relationships
• Go for the quick fix (alcohol/drugs)
• Isolate yourself
• When something is working – obsess over it (e.g. exercise)