Getting Support

NHS

A miscarriage can have a profound emotional impact on you and also on your partner, friends and family. Advice and support are available during this difficult time.

Remembrance

It's usually possible to arrange a memorial and burial service if you want one. In some hospitals or clinics it may be possible to arrange a burial within the grounds. You can also arrange to have a burial at home, although you may need to consult your local authority before doing so.

Cremation is an alternative to burial and can be performed at either the hospital or a local crematorium. However, not all crematoriums provide this service and there will not be any ashes for you to scatter afterwards.

If your pregnancy ends before 24 weeks, you do not need to formally register a miscarriage. But you may be able to get a certificate in memory of your baby, if you want one.

Emotional impact

Sometimes the emotional impact is felt immediately after the miscarriage, whereas in other cases it can take several weeks. Many people affected by a miscarriage go through a bereavement period.

It's common to feel tired, lose your appetite and have difficulty sleeping after a miscarriage. You may also feel a sense of guilt, shock, sadness and anger – sometimes at a partner, or at friends or family members who have had successful pregnancies.

Different people grieve in different ways. Some people find it comforting to talk about their feelings, while others find the subject too painful to discuss.

Some people come to terms with their grief after a few weeks of having a miscarriage and start planning for their next pregnancy. For others, the thought of planning another pregnancy is too traumatic, at least in the short term.

If you're in a relationship, it can help to make sure you're both open about how you are feeling. Your partner may also be affected by the loss. Men sometimes find it harder to express their feelings, particularly if they feel their main role is to support the mother and not the other way round.

Miscarriage can also cause feelings of anxiety or depression, and can lead to relationship problems.

Getting support

If you're worried that you or your partner are having problems coping with grief, you may need further treatment and counselling. There are support groups that can provide or arrange counselling for people who have been affected by miscarriage.

Your GP can provide you with support and advice. The following organisations can also help:

Useful resources

EA is committed to ensuring that all individuals are treated fairly and with dignity and...
This Teachers' Maternity Leave Scheme has been updated to reflect the rules concerning...
We are delighted to provide this FREE digital toolkit. Designed in partnership with the...
There are a number of health campaigns throughout the year to raise awareness of...
Cancer Focus NI, Keeping Well vans are mobile drop-in units which bring health checks,...
Sometimes when faced with an unplanned or crisis pregnancy it is difficult to discuss it...
This includes: Raising awareness of depression and Aware NI services at a wide range of...
The Menopause Project is an education and research project between Informing Choices NI...
Affected by breast cancer? Join this group to share experiences and ask questions to...
We all have good and bad days but what and when we eat can influence our mood, energy,...
Cancer Focus NI can provide a wide range of presentations to meet the needs of your...
Around one in five women will experience a mental health issue during pregnancy or within...
This programme is a six week training programme for groups of adults and focuses on...
Food diary, exercise tracker and diet coach
Support hub for mothers
Track your treatment and wellbeing
Pregnancy and guidance for after birth
Active 10 is a free and easy to use walking app that tracks your walking and shows you...
It’s an easy to follow programme known the world over, and perfect for those new to...
Guided meditations
Handle stress and anxiety on the go
Support for breast cancer
Guided meditations
The availability of free period products in public spaces has been increasing owing to...
Learn to manage negative thoughts and look at problems differently
Your Mind Plan offers practical ideas and advice to help you boost and maintain your mental wellbeing. Answer the quick 5-question quiz and the Every Mind Matters widget will give you 5 tailored actions to help you feel more in control, improve your sleep, deal with stress and anxiety, and boost your mood – as well as the option to easily swap any actions and to save the whole plan via email.

Articles & Videos

Helplines & Web Chats

Informing Choices NI - Helpline
Royal Osteoporosis Society - Helpline
Macmillan - Forum
Macmillan - Ask an expert
Women's Aid - Forum
Association for Post-Natal Illness Helpline
Women's Aid - Domestic abuse helpline