If you’ve just been diagnosed with prostate cancer, you might feel scared, worried, stressed or even angry. Your feelings may change over time. There’s no right way to feel and everyone reacts in their own way. When you’re told you have cancer, it can be a shock and you might find it difficult to take everything in and cope with the information. Thinking about your cancer and possible treatments can be stressful and you may have lots of questions.

You may feel anxious about the future and how having prostate cancer will affect your life and your loved ones. There are people who are there to support you and there are things you can do to help yourself. Families can also find this a difficult time and they may need support too.

How you can help yourself

Everyone has their own way of dealing with prostate cancer. You may find it helpful to read booklet Prostate cancer: A guide if you've just been diagnosed. In the booklet we explain what prostate cancer is, the tests you may have to diagnose it, and the treatment options available.

Look into your treatment options

Depending on your results, your cancer might be treated as:

• localised prostate cancer
• locally advanced prostate cancer
• advanced prostate cancer

There are different treatment options for each stage of prostate cancer. Find out about the different treatments that you could have. Bring a list of questions to your doctor or nurse. And ask about any side effects so you know what to expect and how to manage them. This will help you decide what’s right for you.

Talk to someone

Share what you’re thinking – find someone you can talk to. It could be someone close or someone trained to listen, like a counsellor or your doctor or nurse. People involved in your care should be able to help with any questions or concerns you might have.

Set yourself some goals

Set yourself goals and things to look forward to – even if they’re just for the next few weeks or months.

Look after yourself

Take time out to look after yourself. When you feel up to it, learn some techniques to manage stress and to relax – like breathing exercises or listening to music. If you're having difficulty sleeping, talk to your doctor or nurse.

Eat a healthy, balanced diet

We don’t know for sure if any specific foods have an effect on prostate cancer. But eating well can help you stay a healthy weight, which may be important for men with prostate cancer. It’s also good for your general health and can help you feel more in control. Certain changes to your diet may also help with some side effects of treatment. Read more about having a healthy diet.

Be as active as you can

Keeping active can improve your physical strength and fitness, and can lift your mood. We don’t know for sure if physical activity can help slow the growth of prostate cancer. But it can help you stay a healthy weight, which may help to lower your risk of advanced prostate cancer. Physical activity can also help with some side effects of treatment. Even a small amount can help. Take things at your own pace. 

Who can help?

Your medical team

It could be useful to speak to your nurse, doctor, GP or anyone in your medical team. They can explain your diagnosis, treatment and side effects, listen to your concerns, and put you in touch with others who can help.

PCUK Specialist Nurses

Our Specialist Nurses can help with any questions and explain your diagnosis and treatment options. They have time to listen, in confidence, to any concerns you or those close to you have.

Trained counsellors

Counsellors are trained to listen and can help you to find your own ways to deal with things. Many hospitals have counsellors or psychologists who specialise in helping people with cancer – ask your doctor or nurse at the hospital if this is available. You can also refer yourself for counselling on the NHS, or you could see a private counsellor. To find out more, visit www.nhs.uk/counselling or contact the British Association for Counselling & Psychotherapy.

PCUK one-to-one support service

Our one-to-one support service is a chance to speak to someone who’s been there and understands what you’re going through. They can share their experiences and listen to yours. You can discuss whatever’s important to you. We'll try to match you with a trained volunteer with similar experiences.

PCUK's online community

Our free online community is a place to talk about whatever's on your mind – your questions, your ups and your downs. Anyone can ask a question or share an experience. It’s a place to deal with prostate cancer together.

Support groups

At support groups, people get together to share their experiences of living with prostate cancer. Some groups also hold meetings online. You can ask questions, share worries and know that someone understands what you’re going through. Some groups have been set up by local health professionals, others by men themselves. Many also welcome partners, friends and relatives. For an up-to-date directory of local groups, and for information and advice on starting or running a support group, please visit the Tackle Prostate Cancer website.

PCUK fatigue support 

Fatigue is a common symptom of prostate cancer, and a side effect of some treatments. Our specialist nurses can talk to you in depth about your experience of fatigue, and the impact it’s having on your day-to-day life. They can also discuss ways to help you better manage your fatigue, such as behaviour and lifestyle changes.

Spiritual support

You might begin to think more about spiritual beliefs as a result of having prostate cancer. You could get spiritual support from your friends or family, or from your religious leader or faith group.

Talking to family and friends

You might be worried about telling your friends and family that you have cancer. You might be concerned about how they’ll react or if you’ll upset them. It can be difficult to know how to start a conversation. Try to find a quiet place and explain to them that you have prostate cancer. You might find it helpful to show them this information.

Ask them if they have any questions. If you don’t know the answers, you could write down their questions and ask your doctor or nurse at your next appointment. If you don’t feel able to tell your friends and family, you could ask someone you trust to tell people for you.

Macmillan Cancer Support produce information that can help you figure out where to start and make these conversations a bit easier. It includes information about talking to children.

If you have brothers or sons, you might want to talk to them about their own risk of prostate cancer. This is because men are two and a half times more likely to get prostate cancer if their father or brother has had it, compared to someone who doesn’t have any relatives who have been diagnosed with prostate cancer. They might want to talk to their doctor or nurse about their situation, particularly if they are 45 or over.